I love being a woman. I love being a mom, wife, friend, sister, and daughter. I love studying the Bible and teaching the Bible. But most of all, I love knowing that I serve no other audience than an audience of One – God.
One thing that you should know about me is that I am in continual recovery from living for the approval of others. For years, I struggled to serve every audience within my reach and lived and longed for their approval. Until one day in 2015, when it all fell apart.
Since then, I have striven, almost daily, to remind myself of this truth – that I serve an Audience of One.
I spent ten years in ministry and heard time and again woman after woman share feelings of inadequacy. “I am not spiritually qualified to…,” “I have made so many mistakes,” “I did/did not (fill in the blank).” This false self-belief rings as true in a seventy-year-old woman as it does in a seventeen-year girl. No woman is exempt.
I understand these feelings because I am a frequent rider of the “inadequate feelings struggle bus.” I have learned (through some hard lessons and counseling) that these feelings come from living to please others. They arise we strive to please any audience outside of One. Inadequacy is a universal lie that cripples us from fully living as the women we are created to be, ultimately robbing us from joy.
My Gal Tuesday was birthed in 2015 from this desire – to help women cultivate the spiritual in their hearts – instead of feelings of inadequacy. By “spiritual” I mean a deeper understanding of God and self.
I used to believe that as a Jesus following woman, I needed to know and instill as much Bible as possible into my little sphere of influence. In hindsight, I am pretty sure this is how the Pharisees in Jesus’ day thought too – the idea that knowing a lot about God was the same as knowing God. But over time, I very slowly began to recognize the lie that says: “knowing was growing”. Do you know this lie? The one that tells us that we are free because we “know” things?
This belief can bind us down like chains.
For freedom is not found in the knowing, it is found in the being.
I long and desire for My Gal Tuesday to be a place where women can simply be with the Lord and with one another – through the Word and through a caring community. It’s a space where women are free to be just as they are and it’s shaped around the truth of God’s Word.
I believe with all of my heart that the more we understand ourselves, the more we understand God, and the more we understand God, the more we understand our world and our place in it. When this happens, the struggle bus of inadequacy makes less frequent visits and joy is more readily found.
Go in peace sweet friends,